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Stephanie Howell

reading, organizing, shopping, momming too close to the sun. Home is wherever the Army sends us.

where do i find the time?

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 confession time. i'm going to share a pet peeve of mine with you. i really, really don't like it when non-crafty people look at me like i've sprouted a second head and say…

"where do you find the time?".

i do not like it. not one little bit. it perturbs me. or as my friend jamie would say, it "makes me stabby". haha! 

and before some of you get stabby with ME, let me clarify. i'm not speaking of the person that genuinely wants to know, the person that is not saying it in a condescending way. i'm talking about the person that says it in a smug way.

this is something i've noticed over the past few years, a comment that keeps popping up here and there.

 

here's my thought process on this.

we ALL have the same hours in the day.


some of us choose to run marathons. some of us watch television. some of us read. some of us volunteer. some of us cultivate a spotless house (not me). some of us are caught up on the laundry.

some of us work outside the home. some of us garden. some of us exercise.

some of us craft.

some of us can do more than one of these things.

 

i LOVE being creative. it makes me me. does that make sense? i'm a happier person with creativity in my life. i grew up around a creative mother. creativity is what i love.

 

don't make me feel like i waste my time,or as if my hours are less valuable than yours. whew…i said it!

 

i always feel as if "where do you find the time?" is a backhanded compliment.

 

as if i must be neglecting my family. or locking the babies in a cage while i make decoupaged toilet paper roll holders.

or like i'm  wasting my time. or as if i have no life.

 

i LOVE making things. i love scrapbooking. i love making my home beautiful. i love throwing parties for my girls (with handmade decorations).

this does not mean i neglect other areas of my life (ummmm, well maybe the laundry needs some help).

this does not mean i put my kids in front of a tv 8 hours a day so that i can scrapbook.

and it doesn't even come CLOSE to meaning that *my* time is any more valuable or any more special than yours. i don't think i'm better than anyone who *doesn't* hand craft birthday decor. it doesn't mean i think i'm better than someone who doesn't enjoy making. i don't even think about it! everyone has their "thing". my thing is making.

 

where do i find the time? i make the time. i try to spend a few minutes a day doing something creative. that might mean that i make a tree topper (glitter and paper plates- we can't ever find one we like to buy!) with my girls. it might mean i hand wrap a gift. it might mean i buy a bouquet and put it in a transferware pitcher. it might mean i make a scrapbook page, or journal,or decorate my mantel.

sometimes i don't have the time. i don't find it. i feel like that recently. and i miss it! i feel less "me". less fulfilled.

yesterday decorating the tree and decorating the mantel fulfilled my need. paper crafting has falling a bit by the wayside but i'm having to fill that hole in other ways right now.

 

i make the time because it is important to me! and my family appreciates it.

i do have a life. and it is enriched by living creatively!

 

it was the same way when i was a prolific exerciser (is that a word???)- i've fallen off the wagon a bit. haha! but people would say the same thing.

 

is it a woman thing? do women have to say this to one another to justify their choices? or make themselves feel better about something that's bothering them?? i don't get it! you don't need to say it to me! you do what you enjoy doing, i do what i enjoy doing.

 

one is NOT better than the other!

wow. i feel much better now that i've shared that with the world.

dare i say that blogging might be just as good as therapy? at the very least it's just as good as punching a punching bag.

hahahah! happy thursday y'all!…spend it doing whatever floats YOUR boat. i promise i won't judge you for it. 🙂 ♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

xxo

s

 

Comments

  1. i’m glad you find the time. I love seeing what you create. I feel the same way. There are some weeks were I just can’t make it fit in, but then I block out a weekend day to make it about crafting because that time is important to me so I need to make up for it and fit it in somehow.

  2. I agree 100%! (and secretly, my boys do like to look at the pages I’ve done because they know that the pictures – turned into pages – are important to our family) Keep the craft spirit alive! 🙂

  3. Thanks for the reminder. There are times that I want to scream “You have choices” to one of my coworkers. Thanks again, too, for being real.

  4. So you’re saying you DON’T lock the babies in cages?? I thought I had you all figured out! 😉
    I think people say stuff like that out of insecurity.

  5. amen! I feel exactly the same way! and your 746538624478484874 readers love what you do and that you make the time for it when you can! 🙂

  8. well said. i feel the same way. i think i get more of the 2 headed look when people find out that i am a stay at home mother and say, “what do you do with your time all day long?” i’ve (sarcastically) come to say, “nothing…i just watch TV and eat bon-bons all day…” 😉 and that normally shuts them up! but honestly, i do so much and my memory is so bad *ahem* that most days i can’t remember what i do all day. i think you said what a lot of us feel “accused” of in a very smart way. keep sharing your heart and your creativity!! xoxo

  9. Totally agree with all of the above. Women are so judgmental- it’s sad. Always comparing themselves to every one else, especially as mothers. If there is something you have a talent for that others don’t, these women tell you in a it’s passive aggressive way and I can’t stand it! I also agree that blogs are for therapy. I speak my free mind there and don’t have to worry about it! Good post!!
    http://davisfamilydining.blogspot.com

  11. Stephanie, You’re at it again…speaking to my heart! I work full time and my hubby stays home with our boys. I get the exact same comments. Guess what? I don’t watch TV…I craft! It 100% relaxes me and my boys are quite often in my craft room creating along with me. I LOVE IT! And…I too don’t really know what to say when people say that to me. Do what you LOVE, LOVE what you do! My 8 year old told me, “Mommy, when you retire, we can make cards all day together.” I loved that. He’ll have a real job by then, but I’m all for it! And…oh yes…blogging is therapy!

  13. yeah, not a fan of the comment “I just don’t have the time for that.” … ugh. We all find the time to do what we choose to do with it 🙂

  14. I’ve had people tell me I won’t have time to scrapbook once my baby girl arrives in March. I want to say, don’t you still watch football? So I totally hear you on the need for “me” time! I think it will make me a better mom to try and maintain some kind of crafty time. I am sure you feel more relaxed and patient on days where you have squeezed in a few minutes to be crafty!

  17. I think you nailed it when you said “do women say these things to justify their choices?” Yes. The competition among women is harsh and fierce and I do not understand it. We live in a time where we have so much information and ability to do so many things — but can we really do it all? NO. There is a lot of pressure on us to excel in all areas but that just cannot happen. I, like you, try to strike a healthy balance. I truly think the very best measure to judge is by your children. And by what I can see they are HAPPY, HEALTHY, LOVING, KIND, SMILING, LOVED little children. That sounds like success to me. 🙂 Happy crafting.

  18. Well said! I NEED to do creative things. I hate other people judging my “hobbies” as a waste of time.They keep me sane & happy.

  19. I *heart* you Steph! ITA. I get the same thing sometimes about staying home with the kids… like I am less than human because I like to stay home instead of working. My family and my home are what are important to me.

  20. I think people make comments like that because they too want to be creative, but maybe they don’t know how. Maybe they never explored or had that part of them opened up. I think instead of getting upset about it we should invite them over to craft! Then they would see how fun and relaxing it is…and that children can be involved in the crafting process. My middle daughter has her own table in my craft room and she makes stuff everyday. For those who dont’ want to be crafty and just want to be jealous I simply tell them…I make the time because it’s important to me! Happy day to you…I’ve got some salt dough to mix up!

  21. Im not mad. 🙂 I specifically said this isnt directed at people that genuinely ask in a non snarky way. Im not shedding a tear over it or angry. Just Sharing my thoughts. 🙂 have a great day !
    Sent from my iPad

  22. Very well said! I have to — HAVE TO — do something creative each day, too. It is just ME. When I can steal away a few moments [mere minutes even] of craft time, I am a much happier person that day. Seriously. People may have different “outlets” in their lives, and they need it on adaily basis to fulfill life, just as creative folks need their creative time.

  23. I often hear the same comments, but it’s the condescending tone that really irks me. I choose to spend my small snippets of free time creating…not watching TV or reading magazines or whatever else others do to relax…and so at the end of my “me time” I have something to show for it. I think that’s perhaps where the difference lies between people who create and people who don’t.
    As you said…whatever floats your boat 🙂

  25. “do women have to say this to one another to justify their choices?”
    Stephanie – I think you hit the nail on the head with this one. I used to work as a parent educator, and saw women feeling defensive on a regular basis about their choices. Whether it was with parenting (eg. bottle feeding vs. breastfeeding) or working vs. staying home.
    Who was using organic? Letting children watch t.v. And so much more.
    I would always tell my families, don’t ever let that guilt get to you. It’s important to do what is right for YOUR family! There is just so much pressure. And I think when *some* women see others making different choices it makes them second guess their own. And then they go into attack mode!
    I know there have been occasions where I have had those second guesses when I see another woman who seems to be “doing it better”. But then I think about my own life and how while I could make some changes, I am really happy most days 🙂
    So now I just smile and say simply, this is what I believe, or what I need, or what I love. And leave it at that 🙂
    But loving the expression “stabby”. I know I have felt that way on a few occasions :p

  26. i agree with you! i never thought you put your babies in a cage lol or have them watch tv for hours, its about making time.
    if you think about, we humans waste a lot of time doing nothing important, like watching tv or daydreaming or just being lazy and sitting on the couch staring into space. i myself have done all these. but, i am like you except now i like to exercise more than sb!
    to each his/her own!

  27. I admire all that you do Stephanie!
    I think it’s GREAT you MAKE the time to create, it’s important to have YOUR own thing, something that makes you feel complete!
    I feel the same way about scrapbooking and was ALWAYS asked this by my non-scrapping friends in much the same way. Not in the way like, “oh I admire you can do that, but WHY do you do it, it’s a waste of time” and I resented that! I would say, well some people watch tv etc. and I scrapbook & read & workout (lately all 3 have taken a backseat to grading papers, lesson planning and running all over creation for dr. appts.but that’s another story)..anyway, keep CREATING and I will keep loving your pages and I will TRY to make time for it myself because I miss it, I love it and it also makes me feel complete!!!
    hugs friend!
    I love seeing what you make!
    tara

  28. Amen, Stephanie! I have friends that say that all the time! And I agree, I try not to judge whatever is important to my friends, but sometimes they don’t get that my creative time is important to me.
    Also, I try to live my life doing what I want and making whats important to me-important. I don’t want to be that person who says ‘I wish I could do this’ or ‘I can’t waitto do this-someday’. If I don’t make time to make it happen, then in the long run, it may not be that important. I try not to be too hard on myself when I can’t do everything, I wish more people could do the same. We all deserve a life where we do what we need (work, chores, etc) and make time for what we like (exercise, getting messy fingers, travel)
    I hope it’s ok, I’m going to link to your post on my blog-I think it’s great!

  30. I think you may be misunderstanding that comment (how do you find the time?), I genuinely think people ask because they want to know how you find the time, they need advice on what your secret is. I have a need to make things as well and never have the time, ever. I feel pulled in so many directions in my life and crafting takes the backseat and it saddens me. Yeah, there is no ‘secret’, it’s about what’s important to you.

  32. Asha- if you read the beginning of the post I say Im not referring in any possible way to those people that genuinely ask in an honest way. Cross my heart. 🙂
    Sent from my iPhone

  33. It is all about choice. I am a better person when I can create. Just because it doesn’t make sense to other people is their problem. I have found if a person is not creative – they are sometimes jealous of your creativity so they “justify” how they spend their time doing “worthwhile” things. I just “blow” them off!

  35. Word! i feel the same way when ppl ask me “so what do you do all day long…” because I’m a stay at home mom with a kid in school and a husband out to sea. depending on who it is our how many times i’ve heard this question ask, i may just say “everything you want to do but can’t because you are stuck at work…” hheehee
    xo

  37. Momma, make time for yourself. You aren’t any good to anyone if you aren’t whole.
    My sister has the most spectacular garden (on the garden tour and everything). I kill every living plant. My only flowers are from floss and needle. Works for me!
    The fact that you do things 5, 10, 15 minutes at a time, like this post probably took multiple visits to the page to complete, is what we do.

  38. Amen! Preach it sister! I too am creative and love to make things. You said exactly what I feel. I just think the people that say that are just jealous of our crafy and talented ability to juggle it all! I work full-time, have an almost 16-year old daughter, and a husband. I make all of our meals at home, they both bring their lunches to work and school. I work from home, so I make my own lunch at home. but come evening time when my daughter is doing homework, the dishes are done, the laundry is done… I am in my crafty room regaining my sanity making/crafting something. I don’t watch hardly any TV. I like TV, but I prefer to create! You keep on doing what you are doing! The world is a better place because of you and all of us that craft!

  40. Amen. I work full time, go to school part time right now; I’m pregnant which makes me tired all the time, and I am busy keeping up with my husband and toddler.
    It is such an amazing feeling when I finally have some ME time, and I like to be creative during that time because it’s therapeutic for me, and it enriches my life and the people in it. My husband is passionate about my hobby, and he is so supportive when I need my full SATURDAY to crop. It happens once per month, but I set aside that time for me. As should others 🙂
    Yes I’m still a wonderful mom; yes I’m still tired all the time; yes I make it to work on time each morning and leave at five each day, and yes I’m a straight A student perfectionist, but that does not get in the way of my creative time each month!
    How I wish there were more hours in each day that way I could be creative each and everyday! YOU go girl!

  41. “is it a woman thing? do women have to say this to one another to justify their choices? or make themselves feel better about something that’s bothering them??” I’ve wondered this, too. They say that we are our own worse critics but sometimes the neighbors are fairly good at it too, you know.
    But I’m with you: I loathe that “I don’t know how you find the time” comment. It IS a back-handed compliment. I don’t FIND time, I MAKE it because if I don’t I get cranky. Me time = better mother, and if that seems selfish to someone else…too bad!

  42. I think you’re right – we ask these quesitons because we are justifying our choices and we’re really jealous that we don’t makes *such and such* a priority.
    I find myself in this boat a lot. I even read your blog and think, “Goodness, where does she find the time!?!” And it’s somewhere between actually wanting to know, and not really wanting to know because I’m sure you sacrifice something to make that time. 🙂
    I guess what I’m saying is, I really thought you hit the mark when you commented about justifying priorities. I think sometimes, unaware to us, we are a bright neon sign that flashes, “HEY YOU, IF YOU PRIORITIZE YOU CAN DO THIS TOO!” And we do it without even knowing. {We do this with our lifestyle, our Christianity, our creativity.} But if we are motivated by love {which is SO obvious with you} I think even people who are at first angered {with themselves}, may one day say, “It’s about time I made this a priority!” And they’ll come and ask us in a genuine way! That’s a great reminded to do all things with grace and love. 🙂 {Okay, end of sermon! lol.}

  43. I’d love it if I overheard a man ask another man (who was describing his most recent golf game), “How do you find the time?” lol 🙂

  44. The condescending tone I get when people very matter a factly say, ” I work full time.” as opposed to my staying home full time with three kids. IWORKFULLTIMETOO. Is frankly what I want to scream. Everyone has choices, everyone has stuff! You choose what u want to do everyday. I choose to stay home full time and make sacrifices to do so. I am happy with my choice. I completely understand the being stabby. Sometimes I don’t know how I do it either, I’m quite impressed with myself. Have a super day Stephanie! I wish your blog had a like button like FB :))

  45. AMEN!!! I know exactly the people you’re referring to. These are the same people that ask ‘why would you want to do THAT’ in a snarky way. I feel better after having read this, so thanks!!

  46. Thank you for this post. We had a get together the other day with some friends to do crafts and I was making homemade gift tags for our Xmas presents. One friend laughed at me and told me I was very type A. I wear that title proudly. Making the tags make me happy and I love seeing them under the tree. I’ve always remind myself to do what makes me happy and my family will also be happy because mama is in a good mood. Continue doing what you do!

  49. I TOTALLY agree…when people ask in a snarky way it makes me stabby too!! 🙂 I have people close to me that have made similar comments and it’s infuriating. I make time for crafting by leaving laundry in the dryer for a week, or by staying up way too late, or by not watching hours of TV (which the person close to me does). To each his own. I don’t care what others do with their “free” time…why should I be judged for what I do with mine? I agree with this post 100%. And now we should all forget about it as much as we can, because people that say things like that (in a rude way) will probably never get it.

  50. I’m fond of telling people I don’t waste time watching TV – nice to turn it back around and imply that their TV time is more of a waste than my craft time. But I’m snarky like that 🙂
    jen

  53. locking babies in a cage…hmmm..I guess I ‘locked’ mine into a jumping seat thingee (do they still sell them?) …ha! works the same and is legal….guess I could have scrapped then…but I think I was sleeping (which explains why there are no scrapbooks for them as babies). Oh, add sleeping to that list of other priorities 🙂 and carry on….

  54. Yay, I loved your post!!! Well said! I’d also like to give you a big Thank You for not doing this December Daily thing! I love the thought of it but it’s everwhere I turn so it’s refreshing to come and read your blog without a heaping dose of “December Daily”, it’s way more fun to read about decoupaged toilet paper rolls;)Oh and BTW those babies of yours have the most gorgeous heads of hair!

  56. Everyone should find the time to do what they love. I’m glad that what you love means we get to enjoy your talent. I think people who make these kinds of comments are jealous because they don’t have an outlet that feeds their soul. When you know what makes you happy and you understand the importance of following that, you are doing what you were put on this earth to do. Doing what you love is your gift to the world. I feel bad for people who make these comments because they haven’t discovered their gift to the world. When we do what we love, we inspire others. Like you do Stephanie. I also believe that you do more for your family by doing what you love. You teach them to listen to and follow their heart and the heart is never wrong.

  57. I’ve felt this way even with other crafters. I’ve been posting my December Daily pages on another site, and someone who was working on their Tim Holtz-inspired 12 days tags (which I am NOT doing) and meanwhile keeping notes for December Daily pages down the road complained, “I don’t know where Carmen finds the time to make such elaborate layouts!” Um — messy house, making daily layouts a priority for the first time in my life, staying up way too late (sacrificing sleep), and really, actually, NOT elaborate layouts. I was like — what the, why am I feeling like I have to apologize for keeping up on a project for, seriously, the first time in forever?!! Oh well….

  58. Ooh, I hate that one, too! I’ve had people say that to me about blogging (and I don’t even blog that much!) One day I was feeling particularly sassy and I retorted, “I find the time somehow, it’s not like I play tennis everyday,” while pretending to have chosen that example at random. (Pss- it wasn’t random.)

  59. Oh Stephanie. Can I be your friend?? I know exactly what you mean. And who those people ask, “where do you find the time,” it’s as if they are so much better than me. Or if all I do is waste away my day crafting while they work or work out or whatever. Um…I’m a professional too, you know. I’m just a lot nicer than you. Sigh…but know that the people who really do have the pleasure of knowing you in real life adore and value you to the core (and your amazing creations).

  60. Brilliant. Couldn’t agree more. I love having something that makes me me and you make me feel like I’d be stronger the next time someone put it down when talking to me. Blogging is a kind of therapy I reckon 🙂

  61. AMEN!! I hear this too and I HATE it!! Like I’ve just got so much time sitting around that I don’t know what to do with. I’m glad to know it’s not just me who hears this.

  62. This same thing just happened to me the other day at my office and I actually felt a little insulted! And I found myself explaining to her that I made this crafty tag at 11:00 at night when everyone was asleep… I agree with you 100%!

  63. I get that “where do you find the time” all the time too. And you said it all perfectly. It is our thing and we make time. I don’t watch much tv, read books, run marathons, or have a spotless house…I like to craft and create…Love it, Love it. Double AMEN to everything you said!! happy creating and crafting!

  64. I completely agree with how you feel because I have received these comments many times too. However, I truly think people (well, most anyway) say it because they are envious. No one could look at your beautiful scrapbook pages and not be envious that their kids don’t have wonderful memories like that! I am a crafter too but I don’t always make time for it like I should. I think it also has to do with being organized too….a disorganized person could not do all that you do! And people envy that too, I think!

  65. Exactly! 🙂 You said it…we all have the same hours of the day! Everyone has different interests and passions and ways to fill those hours, and noone should worry about how the other person spends there’s! Somedays I make time to do something creative or productive, and other days I would rather use that time to enjoy a nap!!! 😉

  66. I think it all depends on what your priorities are and what point you are in life. Creativity is just one that you happen to fit in your day. I have found that I can make those party decorations faster and with less stress than facing the traffic and stores to find them, especially if I cannot find what I had envisioned!

  67. OMG, singing it sister. I was in a situation with a ton of girls, judgemental witches who immeditaly said “i don’t have the time for that” when scrapbooking was brought up. i defended myself to the fullest though and i’m sure was talked about when i left that party but i could care less. scrapbooking, crafting…it’s engrained in me…in a lot of us. so I choose to not spend countless hours on facebook, posting stupid ish and photos of myself trying to look hot. I don’t have a spotless home but it’s clean enough (not hoarderish) my kid has clean clothes and gets all his meals and lot’s of mommy time. i sneak in movie time with the man and some cuddles too. if it means that i’m up at midnight working on a layout and being a little too tired the next morning, then so be it. it’s about making the time to do what i love. I choose to spend quiet evenings with paper than being out and about with said girls. i’m happy you put this out there, especially since you have so many readers. hopefully this will be insightful to those “don’t have time” individuals.

  68. You tell em! I totally agree Steph. People say it to me in regards to working out. I just smile (even though I stab them in my head…did I say that?) and say “It makes me who I am. I feel good after I do it so I make time for it.” Some people just don’t get it.
    I love that you are so crafty. I get inspired looking at photos of your home and your scrapbooks. It gets me thinking of ways to interact with my children and create with them. Your gift of creativity lends itself not just to you, but to others as well. So I don’t judge you for it. ;).
    Have a great Thursday sweet girl!

  69. I know if I am not making something, even my husband can tell. I get cranky. Very well said! Finding time is difficult. I genuinely want to know how others do it to help me out with my time, my planning, etc. glad I visited your blog today. Needed this!

  70. Does stabby = prickly? Why are women so tough on each other? Men never say such things to each other. Let’s hope we can teach our kids to celebrate our differences to take joy and be fulfilled in whatever they do!

  72. That is absolutely not a compliment. It’s like the whole image scrapbooking conjures up of grannies at the kitchen table lick & sticking awful pages into grotty books…no, no, no, it’s just ignorance I think – they even actually *laugh* at me (giggle nervously) but they are really clueless as to what we do or why we do it & quite honestly unless it’s someone I really want to know better I don’t justify myself a lot because I look at it like they have a problem not me. I tell them I do it at night instead of watching TV, which is the truth, luckily for me my kids are a bit bigger now.

  75. Well said my friend!!! I get both sides of the negativity because I scrapbook AND run marathons!!! Imagine!LOL
    How on earth do I find time for that!!You are right it’s all about choices and for me creativity and exercise far outweigh shopping and tv watching……not that there is anything wrong with those but just not how I choose to spend my time………to each her own!

  76. Thank you!! I think you find the time/make the time for things (people too) that are important to you!! 🙂 I think people need to relax and stop being so judgemental all the time. I was wiped out today by 3:30pm when I picked up my girls from school because of my part-time job that I normally LOVE. I need to find the time/make the time for the things (and especially the people) that make me happy. LOVE your post…feeling especially sad today. I appreciate ALL you share.

  77. Wow Stephanie! I love this post! I could just say Ditto to everything! Thanks for posting this! I love to see your creations and I love the posts about your adorable children! Mine are all rotten teens now (not really, but they are teens) and I love to read about your adventures 🙂 Big Hugs!

  79. when my kids were little, I had a craft business from home to help with some extra income. I sewed, and quilted day and night, in between momma time and keeping house. EVERYONE used to say the same thing to me and yeah, it got on my nerves too. Totally understand. I enjoyed being home with them, and HAD to be creative. Like I had to breathe. Some people just don’t get it, and I think they are secretly jealous. 🙂

  82. Amen! I’d like a dollar for every time I’ve heard that comment! And most of the time it was someone that spent their time in front of the TV. I can do both!

  83. Someone I used to ‘know’ asked me the same thing once and I replied that he golfed 3 times a week, ane he replied ‘yeah but that’s fun’.
    Non-crafters don’ t understand (and don’t want too)
    I am thankful everyday day for your creativity!!!

  85. WOW!!!!!! I just had that said to me today…and I have to admit…I was hurt. Every year I make my Christmas gifts for my kids teachers, my co-workers, family and kids. I simply make the time to do this and the bonus is…I love doing it. But when SoMEoNE says or insinuates that I don’t have a life and says they have more important things to do with their time…I get miffed. I totally LOVE your post today. It made me feel a whole lot better and such awesome timing too! I get this all the time and it is so very annoying. Thank you Steph for being so REAL!!!!
    aka: clippergirl

  86. Amen! I get some of the same, it bugs me to no end sometimes! I’m on the other end of the spectrum, with lots of time alone (divorced with one child) when my daughter is visiting her father every other weekend. I get the snarky “Well, of course you have all time in the world”. To me it seems they are telling me I don’t work hard as a mother or working full-time single parent, that because I don’t have a husband/boyfriend or five kids that I am wasting time, etc. What non-crafty, rude people don’t know is that it helps my lonliness or that I just feel better in general “making”. I came from a creative family and it’s something I do out of love of my life and family. People really should think before they speak.

  87. Stephanie, what you have said are my thoughts EXACTLY! I’m always having people say “I don’t have the time for things like that”, and it annoys me terribly. And I always think to myself “we all have the same 24 hours in our day”. Thank you for such a perfectly worded blog post 🙂

  88. I totally agree! I have raised 3 very crafty children because I let them craft with me. We all make time for what makes us happy. Have a lovely night!

  91. lol, I think I am going to start telling me “I steal your time while you are sleeping”….lol.
    I hate it when people think they don’t have time to do stuff too.

  95. So true. none of my husbands friends wonder how he has the time for two fantasy football leagues. And they tease him when he bows out of after work baseball games to come help me at home.
    I feel guilty if I am out and don’t come straight home after buying milk.
    Is it wrong that I craft after the kids are asleep or during naptime? I’m breaking the cardinal sleep when they sleep rule, I know!
    It’s funny, when I was in hs I would paint my nails ‘creatively’. Feels silly to me now to think of it.
    It brings tears to my eyes to think of how much scrapbooking has meant to me. My husband created the first one of our new family for our baby’s first christmas years ago. And it is something I try to do at least a little of everyday. Does it bleed into the daylight hours now sometimes? Is that bad? I don’t know.

  96. Amen Sister! I love your blog and your creativity. I get the same remarks from certain people and I know how you feel.

  97. So well said Stephanie and I couldn’t agree more! Next time someone asks you that question…in THAT way.. perhaps you can tell them that… you don’t FIND the time, you MAKE the time, to keep yourself SANE, and then note that they must not be making the time themselves to do something that keeps THEM sane… ha-ha. Keep being you… we love ya for it!!!!

  99. Dealing with this irl right now actually. I actually feel badly sometimes sharing things that I’ve done creatively. Isn’t that nuts? You put it perfectly.

  100. Similarly, I recently had a female friend ask me how I could possibly “look so put together all the time” with three little ones at home. It was as if she was accusing me of spending too much time on my appearance and not enough time on my kids. It was especially weird because more often than not I am running around town in sweaty gym clothes, but whenever I happen to see this one woman it is a day I have showered and done my hair. I found myself fumbling around for words to excuse the fact that I was looking good.
    I’ve felt a little awkward around this woman ever since. Since when do we need to feel guilty about taking care of ourselves? Backhanded compliments drive me crazy. I alternate between sarcastic responses (“You know, it’s true, I routinely ignore my children so I can focus on my vain and selfish needs.”) and trying to give my accuser the benefit of the doubt (“Are you asking because you’re interested in learning more about papercrafting, more about time management, or more about what makes me happy?”) Both responses tend to either shut them up if they were being snarky or generate great conversation if they were being sincere. LOVE your post, Steph.

  101. Forgot to add:
    Your creativity images and quotes reminded me of one of my faves:
    “Creativity is the sudden cessation of stupidity.” (Edwin Land)
    I often tell people that I spend a lot of time suddenly ceasing to be stupid. 🙂

  103. My birthday is the day before Halloween and a couple of years ago, I took the day off from work and spent it making some over the top Halloween inspired treats for my son’s kindergarten class. I spent the whole night before and day doing this. It was a blast! It was a creative outlet and I loved the way they turned out and how amazed the little ones were with their treats. I had made enough to take to a get together at a friends house that night. Everyone loved them and had so much fun, except one mother (someone whom I have been close to for a long time) said to me, “Apparently, someone has too much time on their hands!” I was very upset and should have (and should now, frankly) realize it had something to do with her and not me. UGH!

  104. Thank you! I completely agree. I’ve had that question asked of me too in the past so I understand from where you are coming. Well said!!! Oh, by the way, congrats on the girls taking their first steps.

  105. OMG OMG OMG = you have just ranted on my pet peeve. This really gets me, I do have the same 24 hours a day but mine is in hyperdrive, I do not sit and relax, watch TV, or waste time. I go 1000 miles an hour, all day long and I get 7 hours sleep, no more! 3 girls, 2 with special needs, my crafting or creative time is the fuel that keeps me going! Thank you for putting it down in writing. I am with you all the way Girl!!!

  106. Amen girl. I own a scrapbook storefront and I can’t tell you how many times a day I hear … “it’s lovely but I just don’t have the time” … to which I usually reply … “if you really wanted to do it, you’d make the time”. I never say I don’t have time to exercise … I’m honest and know that the reason I don’t is that I’m super lazy and hate exercising. I say, spend your time doing what makes you happy as long as your children are fed and loved (sometimes clean) and the house isn’t falling down around you. And thanks for introducing me to my new favorite word … “stabby” … gonna be using that bunches 🙂 xo

  107. thank you! I needed to read this. I may come back tomorrow and read it again. Sometimes I let others make me feel bad or I question myself. But I am very thankful for my talents and I too LOVE being a crafty momma!

  108. That is one my pet peeves too! UGH!!!
    You just keep on living your life YOUR way and be happier for it. 🙂
    I really must have extra hours in my day, because I – gasp – exercise daily and try to be a little creative too! haha. My girls are 13 & 16, so to be fair, I am sure I have a little more me time then you do! 🙂
    I love your blog because I miss my little girls and yours bring back memories. Although, I stopped at two – it’s extra fun for me to read about your four. Your creativity is so inspiring and an extra plus to your blog too. 🙂

  109. very well said, Stephanie. i’d like to repost this directly to facebook for those people who don’t understand why i craft!!!!! who cares why i like to craft? i am not out drinking and partying…i am taking good care of my children. like you, it keeps me sane and makes me feel good about myself. 🙂 thanks for sharing your thoughts in such a well written way!
    danielle

  110. Ooooh – love this!! I get asked the same thing all the time, and though I would feel really bad saying, ‘I make time, duh..’ (lol), I really really want to, sometimes. 🙂

  111. Nice background of this post or we can say that beautiful theme of this blog..Everything should love what they do and do what they love..