So if you read my 15 Confessions on the 15th post last week you may have noticed # 4.
4. There is no such thing as ordered line waiting. It’s all just basically a clusterF*&#. There are no straight lines, just groups where everyone is breathing down your back and stepping on your toes. There is no personal space. You will wait for an hour and once you get to the front they will send you to another line where you will wait for another hour. When you get to the front of that line, they will be closed for riposo. You will come back later and start the whole process again, but the person at the front will act like they’ve never seen you before and then they will put up the “Chiuso” sign and go drink coffee.
If you are thinking to yourself…”Self- is this really true? Or is she exaggerating? What does she mean exactly?” Then today is your lucky day!
I’ve got a little story for you. But before I begin my story I think we need a picture to accompany it.
There we go. That’s the best I can do. This photo adequately portrays how I felt during the incident I’m about to describe.
Moving on.
Every year I have to renew the registration on our cars. Since my van is 2010, I have to have it inspected every year… (newer vehicles can skip this part.)
Note: There is one place to get my vehicle inspected and one place to register it.
Last year my van failed inspection. The guy told me to get new rear tires and pop out a dent in my bumper. So I did it. And passed.
This year here’s how it went. Let me break it down for you.
1. I got into line to have my car inspected and waited 2 hours. I got to the front of the line and was promptly sent away because I didn’t have the right copy of my current/about to lapse registration.
2. I went to the registration office and waited an hour to get a copy. I was sent away because they couldn’t just make me a copy. I had to go to the carabinieri (Italian police) and file a lost document report. They needed to sign it and then I could come back to get a copy.
3. I went to the translator who did not know what form I was talking about. I finally found someone who could figure it out and this person gave me the lost document form. They then sent me to the carabinieri.
4. The one guy that could sign the form wasn’t there. I was told he might be getting coffee or getting his hair cut but no one really knew. I stood outside his door for an hour and then gave up and went home.
5. I came back later that day and everyone was gone for riposo.
6. I returned the next morning and the guy still wasn’t there. I had someone call him but he didn’t answer. No one else knew what this form was and therefore no one could sign it. I waited an hour and finally someone felt bad for me and signed the form.
7. I went back to the registration office and waited for an hour or so to get a copy of my registration.
8. I went back and tried to get in line for the inspection (it was about 10 am in the morning) but they were not taking any more cars before lunch.
9. I came back to inspection again the next day, waited almost an hour and a half, and failed inspection. They wanted new front tires, me to knock a dent out of the bumper, and they told me my front license plate was not properly attached (or in the right place or something). I asked if this was a new law, since my car’s license plate had passed inspection the prior two years. I was told that it was NOT a new law. Ummm, okay.
10. In the next 2 weeks I ordered new tires online, had body work done and the new tires put on, and dropped the van off at another place (that was recommended by the inspection guys) to have an oil change and the plate put on properly.
11. The next day I went to have the van inspected. I got in line behind 3 cars (no one behind me) and showed a guy my “failed” papers. He said “Oh- redoing an inspection? Just wait right here”. We waited for two hours. I got to the front of the line and the guy failed me.
Because the license plate was not properly attached.
Even thought I dropped it off to have it fixed- apparently the guy forgot and the plate wasn’t attached any differently.
Also- he told me you never have to wait to have a car re-inspected and that I could have circumvented the wait by coming around to the back and bypassing the line.
I did the slow blink at the other guy (the one that told me to wait) and he said -I’m paraphrasing here- WHAT?? (Shrug). You were already in line!
And then- I am not proud of this- I.LOST.IT. Like I had a crying meltdown. So embarrassing. Let’s call it frustration + pregnancy + 100 degree temps.
12. I went to another car place and had them fix the plate. It wasn’t open until noon so I left and went home.
13. I came back at noon and had them fix the plate.
14. I went back to inspection, skipped the line and passed. I also apologized for my behavior and hugged the inspection guy. Hahaha.
15. Back to registration office to finish the paperwork. There were 20 people in line. I went home.
16. Back the next day, waited for 1.5 hours, finished the paperwork.
And just like that… in 16 simple steps…my van is registered in an Italy for another year.
Easy peasy, yes?
And by the way- I couldn’t even drink prosecco to make it better!!!
Wish me luck as I get J’s car done this week. And oh yes, I will have to pay a 500 euro road tax too!
Allora,aspetta,domani.
Omg!!! What a process… Sorry you had to go through that!
What do people do when they work? How much time off would be required for these things? Crazy.
I would have been in tears long before you were. I am the worst with stuff like that and have zero patience. Hugs Mama. That was quite the ordeal.
OMG the insanity!!!!
Oh goodness…that’s crazy! ( and the picture is awesome lol). Americans would never pass this test if they weren’t allowed dents! Good luck with your next car – praying for smooth sailing for you!!
Holy crap!!! I can see why you get frustrated. You are right when you said it was a cluster …. Question though. Didn’t you get new tires last year with last year’s inspection?? Typically, don’t tires last longer than a year? At least, I know I don’t replace them until they hit a certain point. Wondering why you need new ones. The whole plate thing, ugh! Wishing and hoping you have much better luck with Jimmy’s car. Sending you lots of hugs.
Back tires last year, front tires this year. 🙂
xoxo
I am so not surprised (Italians being themselves). Oddly someone here would complain or file a lawsuit to change the system. Americans are of course so impatient. Ha! Well, your last year in Italy will fly by with a new baby. Of course, it will be interesting where you go next.
That’s awful! I would not have been as patient as you.
We honeymooned in Italy and while we didn’t register a car, I think I can corroborate this story! Ha
Omg, what a mess. I can just imagine how frustrated you were. I would have been furious ..
OMG my head would have exploded!
You are a better person than I am !!!
Thanks so much for blogging again, I have missed you!
I’m Italian and I can relate…some things in Italy are really awfull like when you go to the Post office and the queque is neverending!
A thing seemed strange to me, why you had to remove the dent in the car? They never asked me that(I have a small one in my car), I’m just curious..
Buona fortuna per la prossima macchina!
I would have LOST MY MIND!
We haven’t been required to do emissions testing for a while but now that we’re in New Mexico I have to get it done soon because I can’t drive on base until it’s done. Ugh. However… I expect it to take less than 60 American minutes and I AM SO SORRY. xo
Sounds just like getting a drivers license in Texas for teenagers (well maybe not quite as bad but takes some patience). When I took my son they said his birth certificate wasn’t a real one. It was a German Birth certificate and yes it was 100% real not a copy its just the way it looks. The lady was like well its not one as far as she was concerned. I’m like its the only one he has as he was born in Germany. I called for the supervisor. She looked at it and grudgingly accepted it as a birth certificate. Grrrr…….
I think I would have been arrested. I KNOW I’d never be able to handle that! I’ve lived in NJ all my life – that should explain it. (And no comments, please: I LOVE NJ!!!)
But why did you need to get a dent fixed? What does that have to do with how a car runs? (Which is what I thought the inspection was meant to ensure…)
You have amazing endurance. I spent a week in Italy and from my perspective things just seemed on the edge of kaos. I also spent time at an airport in Germany (on my way to Italy) and I was impressed by the efficiency of the German airport employees.
All that aside, my time in Italy was amazing. I also need to give a shoutout to Spain, another beautiful European destination.
Oh honey, I’m lost for words. If I drank I’d drink a large glass of prosecco for you. Sending you a cyber hug and much luck for the next car. CJ xx
And we think our DMV is bad?!
Oh good Lord Steph….I would have lost my SH*@ at step 8 !!!!
I love, love, love hearing your stories and am thankful you have some blogging mojo!
Steph, you are absolutely amazing! I think I would of cried longgggg before you did! Hugs!
QUestion… did you have the kids with you all these times? If not, how could you keep going back w/o kids.. if so… how the heck did your kids handle this!?!?!!? HOLY COW
Oh. My. Goodness. That is horrific!!!!! I can’t even…
Brilliant story, albeit not at the time! It’s not just Italy though; my daughter lived in the south of France for a year and regaled us with many tales of lengthy queues to get papers stamped so that she could join another queue to join a third queue only to get to the front and then find the counter person was going for a two-hour lunch. Or that forms couldn’t be stamped AND certified on the same day. It drove her mad. She couldn’t get over the irony of a country that loved bureaucracy so very much being soooo bad at it!
Dont freaking ask me. Theres no rhyme or reason to any part of this story or to life here in general. Seems like its super subjective and depends on the mood they are in that day. Maybe he thought it effected the bumper?
That’s crazy! I have to get new tires today, but it shouldn’t take long compared to what you had to do!
Sounds like our government/DMV offices here too. What if you don’t register your car? Can you pay someone off….after all it is Italy?
Wow. I give you major props for only losing it once in that whole process. And the twin “scowl” picture was absolutely priceless. 🙂 {{{hugs}}}
Unbelievable!!!
I’m learning through you ladies how fortunate we are in America!
You seriously need to write a book, I would not only buy it but I would happily read it. You have a gift for the story and the 4 soon to be 5 inspiration helpers. It is a winner, do it.
Oh my, Stephanie! This sounds like an adult version of If You Give a Mouse A Cookie! Hope things go more smoothly with J’s car!
That.is unbelievable!! How did you NOT go postal on someone by, like, step 3?? SO sorry you had to go through that!
We were stationed in Vicenza in the late 1970s and this made me LOL. Some things never change!