1. have tea parties with your girls. if they ask you to wear a tiara, do it. real men can totally pull off pink.
2. take your daughters on daddy dates.
3. when your daughter finally gets the hang of potty training, send her an email saying you want to have a “pee in the potty party” when you come home.
4. be the primary bath giver for the first 2 years of your oldest daughter’s life. make sure to always remind her not to drink the “hiney water”.
5. learn to do your daughter’s hair. even if it looks REALLY bad, act very proud of yourself so that your wife won’t say a word.
6. three words. guilty deployment gifts. make sure to tell your wife first so that whatever present she gets said child for said occasion is not ECLIPSED by 5 foot tall teddy bear you will be sending from FAO Schwartz.
7. teach your children what is dangerous by walking around and playing a game titled “touch…touch…NO TOUCH!!!!” for example, when in kitchen:
(at counter)….touch
(other counter)…touch
(stovetop)…..NO TOUCH!!!!!
it’s surprisingly effective.
8. if your child asks you to do the “hotdog dance” from mickey mouse clubhouse, or even the “chicken dance”…you DO it, by golly. and do it with energy. so much energy, that when you are far away and unable to do previously mentioned dance with children, no dance mommy EVER does will EVER live up to your version.
9. be patient with your children. really TALK to them, never as if they are babies. get down on their level and really LISTEN to what they have to say. give them logical choices and consequences and respect their feelings.
10. be the best daddy your wife could have ever imagined. because of this, she will fall even more in love with you each and every time that she sees you with your girls. wear your heart on your sleeve and tell your children often how much you love them and how proud of them you are. wrestle, giggle, read, play soccer, sing, and dress up with your girls. give them an example of the kind of man that they too deserve. a man who is good, honest, brave, and noble.
happy father’s day, jimmy. we love you.