Sometimes

sometimes i think i miss sleeping late.

then i realize i’d rather be up at the crack of dawn, holding onto my cup of coffee like it’s my lifeline,  if it means having two sweet sleepy, high-pitched voices saying, good morning mama!

sometimes i think i miss being a size four

then i realize that having the babies changed my body. and that i may never look like that again. and i’m fine with that. i take care of myself, make healthy choices, and don’t compare myself any more.

sometimes i miss going out for the night at ten p.m.

then i realize i’d much rather be in bed with a good book and HGTV. i always was a homebody at heart.

sometimes i miss traveling. dropping everything at a second’s notice and heading off.

then i realize that traveling to the grocery store is about the extent of it these days, and i’m fine with that. sometimes that seems like adventure enough for me. 🙂

sometimes i miss having a social life.

then i think about my social life. raising two little girls to be kind, good women. married to my best friend.  and i’ll take that over cocktails and chit chat any day of the week.

sometimes i can’t believe i’m thirty two, b/c i still feel twenty two in my heart.

then i realize that i’m content. happy with who i am now, not trying on who i want to be like a new outfit…not worrying about what the future will hold, not wondering what i want to do. i’m at home in my body. with the life God has given me.

sometimes i look at myself in the mirror when the girls are screaming, i’m counting to five and wondering if i’m any good at this mommy thing.

then i realize that this is where i’m meant to be. this is where i’ve been heading my entire life. this is my calling.

and that?  blows the old times out of the water. 🙂

xoxo

s