Stephanie Howell

found this image of j this week on an old disk of recovered photos. this was so long ago! and it makes my heart so happy to see this photo again.

most of the time i find it relatively easy to keep a smile firmly in place on my face and a positive word on my lips.

most of the time i find it easy to remind myself that everyone is different. not everyone has the same frame of reference, same life experiences that i do.

as a matter of fact? so many people have many more problems. many more battles they must fight. many more demons.

99 percent of the time i am strong. I stay busy. I don’t really ever crack. most of the time i don’t let it get to me.

but sometimes?

i find it downright hard.

this was my facebook status this week, and pretty much how i felt all week long:

it’s one of those days that i’m having to bite my tongue when i witness people whining and complaining about silly things.praying for restraint&positivity.

this week? i just feel tired.

tired of hearing narcissistic politicians grandstand.

tired of seeing that some people seem surprised that “we are still at war???”. and just a note…when i’m worrying about my husband and my friends, i don’t need a lecture about “how they shouldn’t be there anyway”.

he is there. i am proud of him. don’t lecture me.

tired of hearing people complain. nonstop. about the heat.

it is 109 degrees where my husband is and he is in body armor.

tired of hearing people complain that their husband has to go out of town and they can’t do it on their own.

yes they can. plenty of us do it for weeks on weeks on weeks on end. you can do it for a weekend. have a little faith in yourself!

tired of reading things like “my husband won’t be home to help me this weekend because he has to play golf again. sigh.”

31 families will never have their husband, father, son home again.

this week i spent more time on my knees in prayer than in the rest of my life combined.

this week i put on my brave face. my mommy face. but inside i was terrified.

this week i hid and sobbed for those 31 families who lost someone they loved.

this week harper and sadie walked in during one of my 30 second “secret sobs” and i made the decision to sit them down and talk to them about what had happened. it was one of the hardest things i’ve ever had to do. ever. but as the children of a soldier…these things are things they must know about. i told them an EXTREMELY glossed over version. but we did talk about the crash.

this week i wanted to punch the media as they disclosed details about what was going on…details i NEVER should have read. not to mention, they need a LESSON IN OPSEC.

this week i wished i could do something for those families. my heart is broken for them. absolutely broken. donating money is all i can do, and that didn’t seem like enough. i wish i could hug and thank all of them personally.

this week when i finally heard my husband’s voice it was the sweetest sound i have ever heard.

this week i felt simultaneously relieved and guilty. my soldier is still okay. so many are not.

next week?

will be better.

we are grateful as a family for the gift of another week together.

if you want to help this week,

go here.

hope your week is beautiful.

xo

s

i LOVE this photo. please look at miss lucy claire’s hair and facial expression.

one of the questions i’m most often asked is HOW DO YOU GROCERY SHOP???

with a husband who isn’t here to help, and four kids…people are curious about it.

well…here you go! i present to you the strategically stuffed grocery cart!!

i was SO proud of myself. see how the food is stacked around lucy on the side? well it was the same on the other side of her. 🙂

and underneath the cart was strategically packed as well.

think jenga. if you remove one piece, it all would have tumbled down. HA!

so this is how we shop. and the bigs walk with me.

yes i am crazy, and yes we do it weekly.

now…since i’ve been seriously couponing i have much more of a stocked pantry. so our trips have been a bit lighter. this week was the exception, as we’d been out of town for 3 weeks.

did i mention i’m pretty proud of myself? hehehe!

i giggle at the thought that i used to think grocery shopping with two was stressful. i also think it’s funny when i hear that it’s impossible to grocery shop with kids. so untrue. it just takes patience and planning. oh, and lots of distractions.

sometimes i’m walking around publix with two girls sucking lollypops (i tell them they may NOT under any circumstances bite them until we check out),holding my clipboard with one hand,pen in my mouth, whilst pushing the cart with my stomach so that i can squeak sophie the giraffe for the babies. HAHAH! i am THAT crazy lady, aren’t i?

note:the babies are now ready to move out of the carrier car seats. so we will have to go to kroger instead of publix, i guess. kroger has the double seats in the front of the cart!

another note: i’ll be compiling a list of the sc,amy tangerine,and flybagz winners this afternoon. look for another post soon!

xoxo

s

layout done for the sunday sketch challenge on the SC blog.

for details,products,the layout it’s based on,and explanations click here.

happy sunday!

xxo

s

Delicious coffee
Teething
Lemonade stands
The discovery of AWESOME photos from my past
Crazy heat
Hugs
Love
Family.
It’s been a much needed gift. And tomorrow we are on the road again.
Be back soon!!!!
Xoxo
S