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Stephanie Howell

reading, organizing, shopping, momming too close to the sun. Home is wherever the Army sends us.

On Whimsy

Recently one of my friends posed a question on Instagram. She asked if we (her followers) would allow our littles to leave the house in costume. That wasn’t her exact question, but that’s the gist of it.

My immediate answer was YES! Of course! Yes, yes, yes. A million times yes.

I have allowed my girls to go out in costumes their entire lives. Monkey heads, cat costumes, princess dresses, Sadie had a phase where she liked to dress like a chef. Harper wore a flamenco dress for an entire day in Barcelona. Crowns are worn on the reg, as are cowgirl boots. Fancy party dresses are worn for no reason at all. Cate had about a month where she wore a monster head every single second of every single day.

As I type this Lucy is in a purple sequined dance costume and Cate is dressed like Snow White, with a winter hat on her head.

Why?

I believe it’s whimsy, plain and simple.

I don’t find it to be disrespectful. Of course I wouldn’t allow the girls to dress like animals, astronauts, or princesses for a wedding or a formal event, those things have a specific dress code.

But I love, love, LOVE this phase of their lives. Soon enough we will be arguing over fashion choices. This is a non-issue. Want to wear that cowgirl hat to dinner? SURE! Want to go grocery shopping dressed like a cheeseburger? WHY NOT! Rock that tiara, sister!

I routinely utter the phrase “No you cannot put on that dress until we get there. I can’t buckle all that tulle into your car seat!”

We spend too much time worrying what others think. I wish I could wear a dang tutu now and again. Come to think of it…why can’t I?

You know the best part? The looks on other people’s faces. 9 times out of 10 (and many days 10 times out of 10), people stop and grin. And many of them stop to speak to us.

This season in our lives is a blink. A flash in the pan. Soon I will be surrounded by sequins, tiaras, tulle, and slippers. And no one will be wearing them. And oh…I will miss this so so so much.

Let them be little. Let them dream, scheme, and play.

Let whimsy win. Say yes to fantasy and daydreams. It’s one of the few things I can always say yes to without reserve.

Can I get an amen?

xoxo

S

Comments

  1. Sure why not…. make the day to people in the pubic.. bring on with big smiles.
    Happy Friday!

  5. This is why I let my Alex jump on the trampoline with no pants on early in the morning. Who cares?! Soon he will be sleeping late and yelling at me to leave him alone. I don’t care if he doesn’t want to wear pants outside!

  6. My kids are in their early teens and still like to dress up for fun (only at home, though!). The funny thing is, whenever their friends come over that is one of the first things they all want to do. They dress up and then make up elaborate games to play out in the back yard. It’s good to be silly, no matter what your age.

  7. My youngest, now almost 12, use to put on talent shows and play dress up…and this was just last year. Now, it’s listening to music, writing her stories, watching movies and hanging with friends.
    So, here’s a huge AMEN! “Let them be little!” I miss this stage and also look forward to this new stage that we’re in:)
    Thanks for sharing this!

  9. #indeed. I love this stage of dress up with my girls. I love seeing these monsters, monkeys and princesses pop up on my feed now and again!

  10. Amen! I took my daughter to Lowe’s in her princess costume the other day, because she said she wanted to wear it. 🙂 I love these fleeting moments.

  14. amen!! I do that too and my mum thinks I am a lunatic! but I don’t care: children are meant to have fun and dream!

  16. Absolutely! Both my son and daughter routinely wear costumes out. My son is in a super hero phase right now so it is not uncommon to have a little spiderman or batman sitting in the carseat behind me. I encourage their creativity and ability to not care what others think. We spend too much of our lives worrying about “being proper”. Let them have fun! PS All four of your girls are just the cutest!

  18. In the devotional I’m reading, the author is asking about do-overs. This is one of mine. I wish I would have not been so worried about what others thought about my parenting and let my children have more whimsy. Now, I don’t really care what others think and I have more whimsy myself. I wear what I want, when I want, even if it is “cat eye” glasses and pearls with my aprons.

  19. I love it when the grandkids do this. I also compliment other children on their outfit, tiara, sparkly shoes, etc when I see them. They grin at me and seem so pleased with themselves. They are little such a short time, let them enjoy it.

  20. Oh Amen Amen Amen Amen! lol When a friend’s daughter was in pre-k and kindergarten she loved Britney Spears (the inocent years)well she wore leopard stretchy’s a buttondown white top tied and a tiara white socks and sneakers! lol my friend and her husband would freak out I said let her do it who cares just keep washing them and in the morning have it ready for her on her bed. She went to school and some kids laughed others did not pay her any mind but she was happy and proud. The teacher and principal sent a beutiful letter about how these parents were letting their child be herself and imagine and dream. They grow up too fast let them entertain the world we love it Grace xoox

  21. Amen! My son wore cowboy boots and shorts one entire summer… let them be children. ;o)

  22. I always let my daughter wear costumes or most any combination of clothes I loved it. Keep at it I love seeing your pictures

  24. My eldest two never really enjoyed dressing up, but my littlest boy, oh how he loves to dress up. LOVES it. He wears his Spiderman costume more than anything. It has a cape which flies out behind him when he jumps (which he does a lot). And how I’d love to have a cape flying out behind me sometimes too. Like you say, let him enjoy it while it lasts. He also likes to freestyle his own outfits, with things like bobble hats teamed with swimming goggles. I do so love to see what he comes up with. CJ xx

  25. Amen sista friend – my big boy is 23 and a serious grad student, but I remember like yesterday making him a Batman cape, which he insisted on wearing everywhere we went. I love, love, loved it. And yes, it is a blink. Enjoy.

  28. Lovelovelovelovelovelove this!!!! I have very fond memories of my BFF and I traipsing up and down our street dressed up in the formal gowns my mom would buy at the rummage sale for me! And we were older than your girls…my BFF was 3 years older and we were still dressing up when I was in 5th grade! In fact, one of our other friends commented on FB that one of her favorite memories was about our dressing up!

  29. AMEN! I say let children be children, let their imagination grow and flourish 🙂

  30. I could not agree more with you and all of the amens. Life is just too short to fuss so much. We need more whimsey. Then come the red hats!

  31. I feel axactly the same as you Steph. My kids regularly go about the house & out (shopping, dinner, doctors, friends) dressed up. My daughter is three & so she really likes to mix it up right now – try a dinosaur head & tail with a fireman a outfit wearing swimming goggles!, I wouldn’t have it any other way.

  33. My boys are 17 years old and people in our little town still talk about how they used to wear duck boots everywhere they went. We all miss those duck boots…

  34. YES!!! Amen!!! I’ve always been like that. And now that my oldest girl is 12 and fashion has definitely taken on a different role I’m so glad I still have a 3 yr old that can have fun with it 🙂

  35. Our daughter wore a pink tutu for two weeks straight at one point. Our son was a Dalmatian dog for a bit and only barked. It’s all in good fun!

  36. Of course! I let my son go out wearing costumes. It is such a quick phase, and I cherish the moments.

  37. A thousand times yes! My girl just turned 7 months & I can’t wait for the dress up days! I am trying to savor every moment though. Always love your outlook. 🙂

  39. Amen!
    Even now, at 10 years old, my daughter likes to go out in costume. Of course, it’s not so much the cutesy things she used to wear, but not a traditional wardrobe. She’s made tulle tutus in a rainbow of colors and she makes me smile when she wears them out.
    When my son was little, his staple outfit was a red Wiggles shirt and black pants. A phase, but a cute one indeed.

  40. I am a 66 year old grandmother and you made tears run down my face with this post. I have seen these phases come and go with my four children and my five grandchildren.Oh how I miss all those precious days. I send you a very loud AMEN!

  41. Absolutely AMEN!!! Loved your photos!! Our little 3yr old GD is staying with us for awhile. It is so delightful and refreshing to see the world through the imagination of a child again!!!
    <3 J
    jwoolbright at gmail dot com
    HerPeacefulGarden.blogspot.com

  43. I vividly remember walking around our local shopping centre in the middle of Summer with my (now 21 year old) daughter wearing a little t shirt and shorts, plus her rainbow wellington boots and a stetson hat. Nothing matched, but she LOVED those rainbow boots and wanted to wear them all the time. She also insisted on dressing herself as soon as she was able, so a lot of the time her clothes didn’t match. On the other hand, my son went through a phase of dressing monochromatically – so his t shirt and shorts and underpants would all have to be the same colour. Orange was a particular favourite. For a time he would wear his Pyjama Sam cape everywhere (PJ Sam came from some computer games in the 90s). I have lots of photos of him dressing up in his sister’s clothes and my high heels, although he never wanted to wear these out of the house.
    It’s such a joyful part of childhood and they grow out of it soon enough, so I say enjoy it while it lasts. It makes me smile when I see little children in dress-up outfits at the shops. And if I see a child wearing completely mis-matched clothing I remember those days of walking around with my own little girl and braving the occasional funny looks 🙂
    And maybe the monochromatic thing was an omen for my son because he’s now in the Air Force and so wears either all blue or all khaki most of the time, haha!

  44. 100% Agree!!! And I do the same with my kids as well! I looooove getting the reactions from people seeing them all dressed up. It always puts a smile on somebody’s face 🙂

  48. Absolutely! I routinely trapeze around town with princesses, bugs, and little red riding hood in tow. When my son was little, Spiderman was my constant companion :). And to be quite honest, if I ever find a princess dress in my size, I might join them! Whimsy rules!!

  49. Amen from a girl with two boys — no tulle, no sequins, no dresses, no pink! Send me a girl dressed up in a princess dress anytime! 😉

  50. Amen! I will have my just married daughter read your post and I’ll tell her “This is a good mom!” Everybody needs strong role models to follow and I hope she follows your example.

  51. My youngest went to kindergarten as ironman 3 (the one with muscles he explained often) because he was sure it made him a better listener. Who can argue with that!?! He often wears princess shoes to the store because they make him so tall and my daughter lives in a spiderman costume. My oldest (18) loves to hear about how he dressed as a firefighter most days for two years. It’s wonderful and lovely and sweet and the perfect way to be a child.

  52. AMEN! I’m so glad to hear you do this…why not! People spend way to much time worrying about what other people think, which is just sad. I let my son where his wiseman rode everywhere and he loved it. You go girl!

  53. Theater here you come. Hopefully you can video tape some impromptu plays, I mean certainly you have enough girls for a theater troop. So much fun!!!

  54. Amen !!! While my boys do not enjoy dressing up, I love that some of their friends do dress up quite often. It’s such a fun time.

  55. I let my little one wear a tulle skirt to a funeral viewing. EVERYONE smiled. She was 4. Why not indeed!

  56. When my two girls their favorite thing to wear was a princess costume and tap shoes. My oldest would delicately click-click -click delicately through the mall, feeling like a million bucks. And guess what-now they are 14 and 16, and I miss those days 🙂 My son LOVED man clothes–khaki pants, a plaid shirt and dress shoes, and yep, he wore them even on 80 degree days. He’s over that phase, too…enjoy it!

  58. You are a very cool and fun mom! Enjoy this precious time while they’re little. 🙂

  59. Love love the spirit of your girls! My twins wore all kinds of crazy things on a daily basis and it never bothered me. Now as they get ready to enter 3rd grade they wouldn’t dare dress up the way they used to. I miss those days, so enjoy them while they last!

  60. My son was Indiana Jones for almost a year and a half, every day. Then he became obsessed with superheroes, and Star Wars. His leather fedora and sound making whip are lovingly packed away…

  61. Thank you Stephanie for that wonderful post. I will make sure to let my dd’s wear their tulle skirts and tiaras whenever they want now. You are so right, they are only little for so long and should have the freedom to express themselves, dress up and just be happy!!

  85. Well said Stephanie, well said!! However, warning….my kids are in college and this continues (sometimes to the embarrassment of their mother)!!! Party on happy people!

  86. AMEN!!! The time will pass way way too fast. Let them be little and enjoy!! Thank you for sharing the Grand Adventure with us!! Love every email!!

  87. When my youngest, now 21, was a little I had made her a snow white costume for Halloween one year….I believe she was 5 years old…..she wore it until she was 12 (she is special needs, intellectually challenged) and she loved it. She would come home from school and put it on! Wear it all day on the weekends. There is time enough for regular clothes, let them live!!! We still have that silly costume in her closet, she said it has happy memories for her and never wants to get rid of it. That is what childhood is made up of….happy memories!

  88. AMEN! yes I am shouting it! haha! I think its great that kids get to express themselves in how they dress. My fav is Cate’s monster hat….the picture of her hiding around the corner with it on is just the best! Love them all, a joy to follow since back to the Harper “ashion” commentary days! Thanks so much for sharing your wonderful family!