after the chickies are in bed, after i’ve had my dinner and watched whatever show i’m watching that night,
after i’ve scrapbooked and done the dishes and gotten everything ready for the morning,
after i’ve turned off all the lights and set the alarm,
that’s when i miss him the most.
i just miss his presence next to me in bed,
the way he always stretches his leg out so that his foot touches my leg,
the way he yelps if i touch him with my cold feet,
the sound of his breathing, and yes, even his occasional snores.
i haven’t slept on his side of the bed yet, and i’m sure i won’t.
the tee shirt he left doesn’t smell like him any more and i hate that.
gosh i miss him.
people always say “how do you do it?”.
and the answer is simple. i love him and i believe in him. i believe he was born to do what he is doing.
what’s the point of moaning and complaining the entire time he is gone? what good will that do me or my children?
i believe in him.
people always say “aren’t you scared?”.
of course i am. every day i’m scared. but i believe that the Lord has a plan. and i can either sit around wondering what might happen, or i can move on. be the best mom i can be for my girls. pray,pray, pray. and count the moments until he is home again. everything that is going to happen was written far before we were around. i can’t sit in the rocking chair and look out that window every day wondering if a car is going to pull up. i just can’t.
i believe in Him.
and his protection and grace.
i believe in what Jimmy is doing. like he tells me, it is his job to lead these men,to protect them and lead them and teach them sometimes. and it’s my job at this moment to take care of our girls, to get them through this, to shape them in to strong, beautiful, good-hearted women.
i believe in us.
don’t worry, i will share more answers to your questions later, but this is what i felt like blogging about today.
happy thursday sweet friends.
xo
p.s. Stephanie Herbert is hosting a Cards for Heroes Fundraiser. 20 percent of all Stampin’ Up! purchases made through her will be donated to Cards for Heroes. Please check it out by clicking on the link above.